First of all, an apology: I really, truly do not like to sound like a moaning minnie, as I enjoy my job and have some lovely clients. But today/this week has been the straw that broke the camel’s back!

One factor may be a trial ad on a new site that doesn’t let you post much information or link to your own website, so people have to call or email you for more details. That’s OK, but on every single ad/profile I state very clearly the type of men I will/won’t see. I have my reasons for doing so, and it’s been vexing to receive countless calls from men I’m not going to see. So:

RULE ONE: READ MY PROFILE/AD/WEBSITE NOTES THOROUGHLY, PLEASE!

Then there is the curse of the working girl – the no show. I appreciate that plans change, shit happens, and so you might not be able to make a booking. But is it really too much to ask to have a quick call or text ASAP to let me know you won’t be able to come?

I will always be happy to try and re-arrange a new time, but I have a zero tolerance policy towards men who simply don’t turn up. Unless you have an incredibly good excuse for being unable to contact me – I will not take a further booking request.

RULE TWO: IF YOU CAN’T MAKE IT, LET ME KNOW ASAP!

Sometimes, I think men believe we sit around all day, showered, hair and make-up done, bedding freshly changed, watching daytime TV until we receive a phone call. Sorry to burst your bubble, but I have other demands on my time and responsibilities. I don’t take kindly to spending more than an hour getting ready for no good reason.

I’d have thought this was stating the obvious, but please – have some respect for me and my time.